You Have Time

I had a dream not too long ago. I woke up and remembered I had met myself in the dream, but 20 years older. It was really fascinating experiencing a meeting with myself in the future. A lot of the details were odd, like sometimes only dreams can be, but the one thing that made me remember this dream was the advise I gave myself.

The advise was in the form of a golden watch, handed to me by my future self with the words spoken by a calm and confident voice: You have time.

I spent time trying to think about this through the following week, and it makes so much sense to me. We stress so much today. Quarterly results. Fitting everything into a crowded week. So much expectations not only set by ourselves, but added on by looking at everyone else and what they are able to squeeze into their week. Adding requirements and demands until you are trying to meet such an unrealistic level of accomplishment and delivery.

YOU HAVE TIME. You always have time. You DON'T HAVE TO make a decision right away. You DON"T HAVE TO take it or leave it. You DON'T HAVE TO give a response or send that email right away. And above all, you don't have to achieve everything at once.

Just think about this: who would you respect more

1) the person who stays long hours, work work work, and always get stressed, and makes a ton of activities with their kids over the weekend, and has a perfectly planned out and mapped out life

2) the person who stands up in a meeting and says, hey I am really sorry that we have to postpone this meeting as we did not get to a unified conclusion in time, but I really want to go and get my kids from school today. And then over the weekend spends time with their kids rather than driving them to different sports and acting activities everywhere.

There is a time and place for everything. YOU DON"T HAVE TO DO IT ALL IN THE SAME WEEK...or month....or year.

What I feel so many young parents try to do is to reach that impossible bar of accomplishment and success in everything at once. Each thing has its time and place.

YOU HAVE TIME. Time to think. To breathe. And to just be.

Choosing employer

I had my first real face to face with my manager today. I mean real as in the first time we sat down, went through priorities and the last months and the nest few months agenda. And it has been long enough to be past the honey-moon-phase (you know, the first weeks on a new job where everything is just great!) and enough time for some good healthy conflicts.

Well, I had my first real conversation with my manager, real in a sense that he dared giving me feedback. And it struck me, that this manager (although all managers have their flaws) is one of the better ones I have had. Not only does i openly share what I have done right - something so many managers often forget - but he also openly shares what things WE should try to work on.

Not even myself in a manager role have ever used "WE" will work on these improvement areas. But just that little word, on top of everything else like: giving constructive feedback, giving praise, setting clear goals for the next weeks as well as the next quarter, setting expectations on what I should own and deliver AND what not to own and deliver. I just went home singing from work today.

Again, every manager has their flaws, but I believe this one will be one of the better bets I've ever made.

Oh and by the way, why I formulate it this way is because I always choose my boss. Every assignment I have accepted, has had one big decision stone it it based on the manager and the style and what other people say about him or her. And good reasons for leaving a job is always if your manager doesn't allow you to grow or doesn't guide you in a growing path with clear direction. Or if the manager is purely incompetent on leading and motivating people. There are just sooooo many bad managers out there, that have only been promoted because they have been around too long. So, you don't have the time to waste working for an incompetent diminishing manager, no!! Make sure to choose your path your career and above all your employer and manager.

I am happy with my choice. And what a difference from the place where I was before, where there were no respect what so ever. And no room for learning or making mistakes. If there is no room for mistakes, how will you ever dare being creative or innovative?

DARE CHANGING JOBS IF YOUR MANAGEMENT IS INCOMPETENT. It can only get better, and it is never a good career to work with incompetent people.

The Magic of Questions

When I first started working, I was so eager to show what I was good for. Make a statement. Make an impression. Every day counted. Every week. And I tried to keep a good face, usually keeping quiet in situations where I didn't fully understand the concepts, trying to come across as smarter and more experienced than I was.

At the time I thought this was a really good strategy. Who was I kidding? I guess the curiosity and confidence comes after a few years in the business. When you feel more established and less insecure about your working role.

These days I love to be the rookie, and stay the rookie as long as I can. With rookie I mean the "unknowing party" the new person on the block. The person who is ALLOWED TO ASK THE STUPID QUESTIONS. Basically, with my new job, I have been here a few months already, and I am daily exercising the right to ask about everything and question every decision made in the past.

Where would we be without questions? And above all, where would we be without QUESTIONING? Value your right to question. Value your right to be curious. Why or why not are the questions children learn the world through, and we parents find it somewhat annoying, but remember: it is through these questions they learn and come up with the most creative solutions!

So why not use these questions yourself? Why are we doing it this way? Why is this team handling these assignments, when it could scale better if sales owned them? Why did you decide to make this a linear process instead of parallel? Why do you do task A before task B?

NEVER STOP QUESTIONING and you will see that sometimes the world has changed, and people have just become complacent with how things are. And you storm in like the fresh new thinker that you are, changing things, and questioning routines, making the company more productive and more innovative. And you also inspire others to think as well. And start questioning.

Just be strong when people who do not like questions, who do not appreciate to be challenged or questioned, whose experience and superiority is assumed to overrule any questions....be aware because these people are out there: the scared managers afraid to loose their respect of their employees if they don't know what is right, the comfortable CxOs that think they already know everything there is to know.
Be aware, and make sure you are not one of them! Start questioning what you already knew. Maybe you can learn the world a second time around, and find the joy of being a rookie once more. It is very liberating and very inspiring.

YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO QUESTION. SO WHY NOT DO IT?