Setting Clear Goals

One really important thing to do to get where you want to be or to grow or get to the next level is to really set clear goals for yourself and with dedication follow an action plan. It is one of the toughest jobs, and with this blog I want to share an approach that has helped me and many of my employees when they have struggled with their performance reviews.

The power is in the words and in the mantras you create for yourself when clearly defining goals. The clear goal statements encourrages you when things seem difficult and help you keep focus.

I used to be a YES-sayer. I wanted to help everyone with everything. I wanted to be liked and I wanted to please people. I wanted to be a good manager, and in that vision of myself I thought that a good manager was supposed to be liked and able to do so many things. Was I wrong or what... Trust me on this one, the only two things a good manager really needs to be good at are:

1. Setting clear goals (and communicate these and the expectations on success/failure)
2. Making sure the tasks and responsibilities are clearly assigned and prioritized - and accounted for.

If you want to become a good manager of your own life and situation - which I hope everyone wants to become - then 1. and 2. are the two things you need to focus on.

So, step one: setting clear goals...easier said than done. Start with brain-storming. You can do this with yourself (verbally or in written form) or with friends you trust. Write all the things you want onto a paper. In no particular order. And I mean EVERYTHING.

Example:
- I want a Donna Karen purse by December
- I want to call my mom more often
- I want to travel more in my work
- I want to have better communication with my boss
- I want to feel more relaxed when the weekend arrives
- I want to...

These are your SELF REQUIREMENTS. And usually the list is long and totally unrealistic. :)

Now sort out which ones YOU really want and which ones OTHERS have made you want. And try to sort out if you WANT them or NEED them, and for what reasons. And if any pair of goals are dependent.

Example:
- I want a Donna Karen purse by December, so I can show off to my friends at the New Years party...
- I need to feel more relaxed when the weekend arrives, otherwise my whole weekend will go to recharging myself, and I wont feel like I have a life outside work. If I communicate better with my boss, I would feel more relaxed... --> I should focus on improving communication with my boss.
- I want to travel more in work, as I feel that makes me grow as a person

With this filtering, you can better prioritise your goals. The ME, THEM, and MUST buckets.

"I need" goes into the MUST bucket.
The MUST buckets are usually for your long-term health or relationship strength. And these usually takes more effort to fulfill but also gives more value back. Pick two of these at a time to focus on, and try to avoid setting up "forever" time lines. E.g. I will call my mom every other week for three months - is a healthy goal, and achievable. And it has a end-date where you can re-evaluate if this arrangement demands too much of your time, so you can fine tune to a happier arrangement.

Goals referring to others usually belongs in the THEM bucket.
The THEM bucket is usually not important for your growth, but you can pick one or two of these goals for your ego-satisfaction if you really think you can afford spending energy on these, once you have reviewed the rest of the list. E.g. I will save Y $ every week for a Donna Karen purse until December 15th, but only if I have more than X $ left after paying and saving all my other goals that are more important. This leaves you with the satisfaction that you may achieve your ego-goal, but don't steal away from more important goals.

The ME bucket is your self-growth bucket (usually) and these you should treat with extra care and attention. They may be (sometimes) "silly" goals to others, but will give you the self-esteem fulfillment. So, these goals need to be prioritized. And I would pick one at a time and focus until fulfilled to a satisfying level.

How you pick the focus-goals from each bucket is varying in difficulty, but once you have the lists bucket-sorted, the highest priority ones in each bucket usually sticks out from the crowd. And since you have divided them into the ME, THEM, and MUST buckets, you will have a fair share and balance between your various goals stimulating all sides/needs of your goal fulfillment and progress needs.

Last step is to book an appointment with yourself to reevaluate your goals in 3 or 6 months out, dependent on what time span your goals can meet. Now you have a goal setting process in place. And 3-5 goals identified. And believe me, it takes less and less time for every review. And you will feel more and more focused on where you are taking your life, in addition to an increased feeling of fulfillment and self-esteem as you reach your goals one by one.

MOST IMPORTANT: if you happen to fail to meet a goal, don't judge yourself. What you need to do in that case is to evaluate why - if it is internal or external circumstances, things out of your control or not, and what you learned. Then quickly move on with a wiser approach or with a discarded goal.

After defining your 3-6 goals for the next 6 months, it is time to sketch a action plan and strategy. That I will try to cover in my next blog.

And last thing, please remember that IT DOES NOT REALLY MATTER if you meet your goals in the end, as it is the strive to get there that gives you the value. THE JOURNEY IS THE PURPOSE!

Glass Ceiling

After my last post I received a few emails with concerns and questions around "what if I meet a blocker and don't see how to get around it with the side-way approach?"

Well, I wish I could say there is always a way. If you don't find it, create it. If there are no higher responsibilities to strive for, because they are all assigned to other people, you could (if it make sense) try to find or create some responsibility of your own. If for no other reason, just to motivate yourself to keep going. I know it sounds ridiculous and meaningless, but sometimes finding a way around blockers takes time to spot. And you need something to keep you focused, motivated, and continuing doing a great job, so that when the opportunity comes, you are for sure pepped and ready!

There is a key thought to hold on to, and that is that most organizations (who are healthy) continue to grow and change. Hence, there is a big chance an opening will present itself in time. If you keep your eyes and ears open, and if you stretch your perspective to other departments and responsibilities.

But I know it is not easy. And when I was in black blocked holes, well, then those words comforted only temporarily. So what can I advise?

I think I can say one thing, but it needs careful consideration, as previous blog-entries have covered. You can decide to look elsewhere and move on. If you have had the same performance evaluation conversation with your boss over the last two years, and if you have clearly - in writing - described to him or her what you want to do and how you want to grow. And there is no response. Well then... it is a signal that you are not listened to, and that your growth potential is being limited by a blocker. TRY TO FIND SOMETHING ELSE. And again, I know, easier said then done. Especially in these times. But GREAT PEOPLE always get hired and always find a way. So keep looking.

Still, I know it is hard. Been there.

The best advise I have had - and it is possible I have mentioned it before - is to choose your boss. That can be reinforced in this context. Don't SETTLE FOR A BLOCKING BOSS. Your manager's responsibility (to deserve the salary he or she has) is to ENABLE YOU in your growth path. Challenge you to get out of your comfort zone. Build strong leaders and communicators and increase skills and knowledge among the staff. If this is not facilitated. If the manager holds you back, then it is his or her loss if you leave for someone who do enable you.

BE BRAVE. MOVE ON. Choose your boss!