The Code Words

7 years ago I learned the code words. The keys to making your boss not only hear you but really listen. I now give them to you:

"I am seeking more responsibility" means "I am tired of my current position and want to grow into leadership and management roles" alternatively "My path is slowly heading elsewhere if you don't provide me a growth path."

"I want new challenges" means "give me a new role / assignment / or responsibility" but it does not necessarily mean a manager position. Perhaps a project or a component ownership though.

"I don't feel motivated" means "I am looking elsewhere already, and probably will stay if I get a better offer / raise or if you meet my demands". Usually after stating these few words, the counter question is: "And what would motivate you?" SO be PREPARED to in a few sentences define what it is you need to feel that spark again...

The worst thing you can do for your career is to NOT THINK ABOUT IT and COME UNPREPARED to a performance review. Your career is your growth path. Don't neglect it, allow it some time, and list the things you did well during the year, to motivate your increased value for the company.

And one last thing: always focus on the tasks that leads to more value for the company. The rest are just not worth it. Focus on things that energizes you and motivates you, but also focus on the tasks and assignments that lead to growth, if you are not happy to stay where you are.

And always take the opportunities that come to you that feels "a little bit over your competence level" as those are the tasks that will make you grow. Never accept something you can already do. That will make you stagnate and get bored before you know it. Fear and butterflies in your stomach when accepting a new challenge ARE GOOD SIGNS!! Let the butterflies buzz. I know you can do it. And so do you.

Good luck with your next performance review. Let me know if you want me to focus on any specific questions within this area. I have tons of tips!

Achieving Your Goals

To achieve your goals (see my previous blog for how to create them) you need to be selective. You can't have 100s of goals at the same time. Select a few, and if possible find dependencies to what goals you should do first, to make path for other goals to be achieved much easier.

Example: If I focus on a better communication with my boss, I can later express my interest in travelling more...

SO....HOW do you achieve your goals. Well there are different ways I have used.

DIVIDE AND CONQUER
Goal: I want a Donna Karen purse within 6 months
Strategy: I will save money to afford it
Divide: I need to save $xxx per month to reach the amount needed
Action plan: If I don't spend money on clothes, coffee, and drinks w friends I can achieve that amount per month...

If the goal seems unachievable, try to break it into steps and backtrack. To achieve A, I have to achieve B, and to achieve B, I need to do C by this time.... and by listing C, B, A, you have your action plan.

Sounds easy? Well, it is harder than one can imagine sometimes.

So, what if parts of the goal is not within your control? Then there is the aim sideways approach.

AIM SIDEWAYS
Keep your focus on achieving the goal. And let all your actions lead to steps closer. If there are parts of the distance that you can't do, at least not in a direct fashion, then do them sideways.

Example
Goal: I want to become manager for the engineering department within the next two years
Strategy: Take more leadership and more responsibility, get assigned to important team-leading tasks, show my value to the upper management, and to the team, etc.
Blocker: My boss does not believe that I am ready to become a manager (and you have done your homework of finding out what is required, and proven that list to him over a 6 month period...) - e.g. you are shore he or she is just blocking
Sideways-approach: Modify your goal -- you can become a manager for another department for a while, focus on showing your management qualities to the support organization, keep your ears and eyes open, talk to their management that you are seeking more responsibility. Apply for opportunities under other managers.

Baseline: You can allow yourself to side-track into an almost similar goal-situation - e.g. if you become the manager of the support team, you grow with the management experience, even though it is not what you first desired (development) and next opening for development manager, you have the management experience on your list....which gets you one step closer.

Side tracking is good, if you stay focused on the goal!

And remember, the GOAL is always to GROW. Grow your potential and your comfort zone.

Glass Ceiling

After my last post I received a few emails with concerns and questions around "what if I meet a blocker and don't see how to get around it with the side-way approach?"

Well, I wish I could say there is always a way. If you don't find it, create it. If there are no higher responsibilities to strive for, because they are all assigned to other people, you could (if it make sense) try to find or create some responsibility of your own. If for no other reason, just to motivate yourself to keep going. I know it sounds ridiculous and meaningless, but sometimes finding a way around blockers takes time to spot. And you need something to keep you focused, motivated, and continuing doing a great job, so that when the opportunity comes, you are for sure pepped and ready!

There is a key thought to hold on to, and that is that most organizations (who are healthy) continue to grow and change. Hence, there is a big chance an opening will present itself in time. If you keep your eyes and ears open, and if you stretch your perspective to other departments and responsibilities.

But I know it is not easy. And when I was in black blocked holes, well, then those words comforted only temporarily. So what can I advise?

I think I can say one thing, but it needs careful consideration, as previous blog-entries have covered. You can decide to look elsewhere and move on. If you have had the same performance evaluation conversation with your boss over the last two years, and if you have clearly - in writing - described to him or her what you want to do and how you want to grow. And there is no response. Well then... it is a signal that you are not listened to, and that your growth potential is being limited by a blocker. TRY TO FIND SOMETHING ELSE. And again, I know, easier said then done. Especially in these times. But GREAT PEOPLE always get hired and always find a way. So keep looking.

Still, I know it is hard. Been there.

The best advise I have had - and it is possible I have mentioned it before - is to choose your boss. That can be reinforced in this context. Don't SETTLE FOR A BLOCKING BOSS. Your manager's responsibility (to deserve the salary he or she has) is to ENABLE YOU in your growth path. Challenge you to get out of your comfort zone. Build strong leaders and communicators and increase skills and knowledge among the staff. If this is not facilitated. If the manager holds you back, then it is his or her loss if you leave for someone who do enable you.

BE BRAVE. MOVE ON. Choose your boss!

To Jump or not to Jump

Some time ago I started a new job. A really exciting position with a smaller company. I am not sure I have come to a true understanding yet what this new job means, but I have a few thoughts to share so far.

It is always hard to make the choice of leaving a secure employment, where you know you are doing a good job and have several years that you can grow and feel safe. However, if you don't feel motivated and inspired, if you don't get energized in your every day, then you must take a moment and have the courage to change your situation. You can't stay put just because it is safe. Your life is passing as you drain your energy on tasks or people that don't stimulate you. You have to ask yourself the question: is this really how I want to spend a third of my life (8+hrs a day)?

I was so nervous at first that I risked everything. Who wouldn't be? A safe income, a great career... But after a few weeks of decision process (these decisions should not be made lightly, as the grass is seldom greener), I came to the conclusion that it was all worth it.

I made the jump. I changed my job. And here I am, trying to take it all in. The new situation, the new products, people, and challenges.

And a conversation from the past with my older sister comes to mind. These words were said in a different context, but are so valid here:

I said: Sure, I'll be scared and nervous again. But I know I will make it. Whatever happens, I know I'll get through it.

My sister said: I can so identify with what you are saying. These words, I think, are a sign of maturing. To see that you are not always ready. Not always on top of things. BUT you do have the tools to tackle new challenges and land on your feet. My husband usually says: Honey, when did it really go bad when you tried your best?

And isn't he right? Isn't our best enough? I will tackle these new assignments with the tools I am equipped with so far. And fight my fear of failure (yes, in spite of all success one still fear failure...). And if I just try my best, I will either win or learn.

I believe we all are born with a good inuition what we need to do. And what the next step is. It is just harder for some to allow themselves to listen to that inner voice.

Don't fear change. Don't fear to jump onto new challenges. It is the chances you don't take that you will regret. Again, and this can't be said enough times, the fear of failure is the one thing that limits your capabilities. We all need to fight our fears, how else will we grow and learn?

Step outside your comfort zone. Listen to your inner voice who knows exactly what you need to do, even if it frightens you. And just JUMP! It will turn out to something really good for you. I promise.

Don't fear the jumps, just plan for the landings.